Tag Archives: seat

It took damn SIX years for switching a seat !!

“Excuse me madam !! this boy is pinching me always, I wanted to switch my seat.”
“Okay. You stay here, Viswa Take your bag, go to the last bench and stay there for the whole term.”
“But actually mam !! I wanted to switch my seat.” I replied back.
“Shut up and stay in your seat Sam!! I saw the test papers and you failed. Don’t ever imagine switching the seat to the last bench.”
“Okay mam”, me replied with a sad expression which would help me at least to stay on the bench rather not on the floor.

This incident happened many years back when I was a kid and I was studying in school.

It was the time where untouchability and switching seats were considered offensive and criminal act, people some times were punished for this atrocity. I wished the future ‘me’ will have the right to switch anything and anywhere to his wish. Sigh !!

Many years later, I decided to switch seat from the left to right and I thought what is the big deal of switching..?? Duh !!
“Six months in prison, and if any road kill, it may end up in hang to death” he said.

“Oh Com’on !! This is unfair. Just a few inches to the right. huh !! whats the big deal about it..??” I asked.
”Please stretch out the hand little bit higher so that I can measure for a prison pajamas and gift it to you on the day of judgement” he said as if ” please press one to activate the hello tunes on your mobile.”

His quote made me think that I’ll switch the seat one day, not today but some day.

After waiting for six long years I finally decided to switch seat.
“But wait!! You need to master the art of balancing the clutch and the accelerator, the control of the steering, the unspoken driver’s language, the…….”
“Oh!! Com’on…not again you jerk.”
“Rules are rules buddy. After completing the course, you must attend a test in front of the Road inspector, and if passed you shall take the right side seat or if u rush it now I still have the gift wrapped for the day of judgement.”

I realized that I have a severe test-o-phobia and police-o-phobia. Okay I need a hammer to shoot on my face. Shit !! I meant that I need to pistol to break my skull. Oh Com’on !! U brain arsehole.
Either the police test or the rest of the life on the left side seat. Make a choice said the brain like the Matrix Morpheus with the red and blue pills.

“Okay !! I’ll take the test”. I murmured and sat back on the left seat.

Next day morning!! I decided to enroll myself onto a switching seat academy. The instructor, 40+, dark skin, salt and pepper hair, and the ‘always smiling face’. That face showed that he is the man of Ahimsa.
“Get back here tomorrow morning 6AM sharp”, he said.
“Waaat..?? !! did he just said S-I-X…….A-N-T-E…….M-E-R-I-D-I-E-M..??”.
“Yeah”, said the jerk.

***

Android alarmed its 6AM. I got ready at 7AM and reached my destination. On the way I noticed a yellowish orange ball slowly lifting up above the horizon. I had never seen that before in my lifetime. people use to call that as “The Sun Rise” but who cares, lets get back to the business.

“Sam, come over here !!” said the instructor. I ran to him. He handed me the most beautiful thing in the whole world, “A car key”.

happy-cuteness-overload-guy-memeAnd that’s it. I have reached my destiny, I am going to switch my seat finally.

“Get in the driver seat”, he sang. I, myself in Ultra-slow motion, opened the door and entered inside the car with the DubStep BGM.

I turned the key and the engine started.